


Let It Go (Keanu Reeves x Reader) Part 1/3

by ficsnroses



Category: American (US) Actor RPF, Canadian Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Reader-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:53:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23321245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ficsnroses/pseuds/ficsnroses
Summary: What do you do when the love of your life is slipping away?
Relationships: Keanu Reeves/Reader, Keanu Reeves/You
Kudos: 5





	Let It Go (Keanu Reeves x Reader) Part 1/3

**Author's Note:**

> Grab your tissues, friends. Enjoy!

The first star in the charcoal sky had come out a while ago now, perhaps two, maybe three hours ago. The fiery, bronze sun had bid goodnight, but it hadn’t replaced the wallowing burn you felt in your heart. The surrounding city had certainly fallen asleep, leaving Keanu and you wide awake as could be, both feeling the blackness of the night swallow you whole. It was an ominous feeling, a feeling of uncertainty, perhaps ambiguity? It had felt that that for a while now. You’d been feeling a lot of things for a while now.

You both were placed at opposite ends of the kitchen island counter. Keanu stood with his head hung low, arms placed on the counter, leaning on them. You could see his veins outlined in his arms, evident of the tense state built up in the room that surrounded you both. You were sat on the other side of the counter on a bar chair, your hands placed delicately in your lap, staring at the floor. You both were avoiding eye contact, the tension in the air was thick as you thought of the right words to say. Were there even the right words to say? You almost hoped there weren’t, it would be easier to stay silent forever. To just let it be.

7 years. You had been in love with each other for 7 whole years, and possibly spent every awoke moment together for 5 of them. You met each other and knew pretty quickly what you were missing in life, it was each other. As cliché as it was, he was the missing piece of you that you never knew you needed, and you were his. You had both been lonely for a while before meeting each other, needless to say, you had become each others best friend, partner in crime, companions through everything life threw at you. It was true what they say about love, you were hopelessly intoxicated with each other’s presence. Every quiet laugh shared in the dark, every kiss placed on the other’s tender lips You missed him when he wasn’t there. You were constantly on his mind in everything he did. You always knew he was in your corner when you needed him. He would listen to you talk for hours when the world seemed against you. You would hold him in your arms for an eternity if you could when his demons shadowed over him, telling him he wasn’t worthy of the life he lived. You both shared an immense passion for each other, and it was evident every time you touched each other. It could have been a simple graze of fingers on each others skin, a hold of hands while strolling, or the way your bodies would become one when you made love. In a crowded room, his eyes would find yours as a smile crept onto both your faces, reminding each other who was most important, even in a sea of people. You were inseparable, spiritually bound, and you both loved it that way. You wanted it that way.

Yet, maybe what they say about perfection is also true. It doesn’t exist. Good things don’t always last. It’s a scary thing to see everything you love about the world, about yourself, crumble in front of your eyes. Its even scarier when you can’t do a single thing about it, and it seems a force is cast over you, holding you back, channeling a storm your way, preventing you from fixing it. Stopping you from saving your sinking ship. Saving your love.

Keanu sighed a breathy, weary sigh, running his shaky hand through his long, raven hair. You bit your bottom lip, staring at him now, waiting for your eyes to lock. When they finally did, you saw the same pain his eyes that was painted over yours. The same pain that threatened to gloss your eyes, causing a burn, threatening to let a sign of all the sorrow you felt glide down your cheek. You couldn’t take it any longer, it was drilling through your body now.

You stood up, walking his way. Drained, you held out your hand for him to take, never breaking eye contact. He took it, feeling a familiar comfort in the way your soft skin felt on his. You squeezed gently, before guiding him to the couch, him trailing behind. You placed yourself down, holding your arms out for him to take place in. He did, he was tired of feeling drained. He didn’t want the indefinite gloom that threatened over to hold you from him anymore. It hurt him to see you both like this, desperately trying to latch on, make your love the way it was.

It started out with small arguments over dirty dishes, or shoes not stored away in the shoe rack. Slowly, it started to transcend into bits and jabs at each other, hurting one another more and more as time went on. Eventually, you would work it out and make up, most of the time just for the sake of making up. It was becoming hard work. Too much work. You would let it brew inside you, bubbling and bubbling until one of you ruptured at the other, unable to take it any longer. It hurt you both more than was depict able. It pierced like the sting of a thousand needles.

He rest his head on your chest, letting you engulf his much bigger frame in your arms. He inhaled deep, breathing in the familiar scent of your shea butter moisturizer that always lingered on your skin. He closed his eyes ,sighing a content sigh, just wanting to feel you close after the agony of the night.

Resting your cheek on top of his head, you gripped him even tighter now, gently running your thumb soothingly over his cheek as you held him.

“Do you love me?” you quietly questioned, your voice broke a little, causing his heart to break a little along with it.

He shifted now, arms still around your waist with his face facing you, staring into your grief filled eyes.

“Of course I love you.” he spoke back, voice low and raspy from not speaking for a while.

You smiled a week smile. “I love you too.”

You now wrapped your arms around his neck, resting your head just below his neck. You closed your eyes now, wanting to savour the moment before it would ultimately end, just like all good things.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough.” You breathed, holding back a sob.

Keanu’s eyes widened, suddenly realizing what you were implying. He pulled you back to face him, cupping your cheek in his hand while his other hand gripped you tighter.

“Baby..” he shook his head. “don’t…please.” His voice was laced with sadness. You rest your hand on his cheek now as well, and he wrapped his large hand around your wrist. Resting your forehead on his, closing your eyes, you let tear escape.

“I’m sorry for wasting your time.” You said, voice embedded with sorrow.

Keanu was tearing up as well at this point, his forehead touching yours as he held you tight. He was on the verge of sobbing. He could feel you slipping away from him, perhaps one of his biggest fears was coming true in front of him, and there was nothing he could do about it. He couldn’t magically fix everything like he did in the movies. He couldn’t make everything fairy-tale perfect, like the movies.

“Don’t you dare, Y/N. Don’t you dare say that to me, not now, not like this.” He cried.

You both held onto each other tighter now. The words were said, laid out on the table for both of you to see. There was no taking them back. They had been lingering in the shadows for a while now, threatening to creep out after each fight. You had been able to repress them until now. But you couldn’t do this to him any longer. Neither of you deserved this.

Your bodies shook with emotion. You both wanted this shitstorm to be a dream.

“I…” he chokes out. “I love you so much, Y/N. I can’t have this end, not like this. I fucking hate that we can’t figure this shit out.” He spoke.

“We can’t keep lying to ourselves, Keanu. This isn’t fair to either of us. I love you so much that it scares me sometimes. I can’t grasp onto you like this forever, I can’t keep you from being happy. I love you too much to do this to you.” You exhaled, even more tears flowing down.

“I’m only happy with you, Y/N. I won’t be happy with anyone else.” He buried his face in your neck, you could feel the moisture from his eyes seep through your shirt. It killed you piece by piece to see him cry like this. He was your world, there was no denying it. But he deserved better than this.

“Please don’t let this be the end. I can’t lose you.” He choked out, shaking his head in disapproval. “I’ll be better Y/N, I promise I’ll try harder each and every day but just please, please don’t do this to us. I love you.” Keanu spoke, looking down, he looked guilt ridden. You gripped his wrist and wiped his tears away with your hand, pressing a gentle kiss right under his eye where the tears had fell from.

“We can’t baby, you know we can’t keep doing this.” You replied, unable to make eye contact.

“Why?” he questioned, his voice breaking as well.

“Because we love each other.” You whispered, coming in to rest your head in his neck. You kissed the delicate skin. You wished there was something you could do to stop this nightmare.

“I love you Keanu. I will always love you with everything I have.” You declared.

He moves to press a kiss to your lips, neither of you unable to control your sobs. He presses delicate kisses along your entire face, over your eyelids, on your nose, on both your cheeks, on your jawline. He wanted to worship each and every part of you while he was still allowed. You felt your heart flutter, a warmness engulfs you just like when you first fell in love with him all those years ago. But you couldn’t let yourself get carried away. This was the harsh reality. You both had to face it, no matter how cruel it was to you. You loved each other, so you had to let go.

“Y/N…honey…please.” He tried one last time, staring you in the eyes. Both your eyes were red from bawling. From ripping your hearts out and placing them out in front of you, desperately hoping a magical remedy could fix this, could fix you.

You took both his hands in yours, bringing one up to your lips to place a tender kiss on it, and finally, resting it on your cheek as you placed your own hand over it, leaning into it, similar to a kitten leaning into a touch. Keanu felt his entire universe break around him, shatter to pieces.

Breathing back a sob, you locked your eyes with his one final time, making sure he understood your sincerity and knew how much he meant to you.

You laid down on the couch, and he immediately followed, pulling you into his chest as he held you for dear life. You both heard each others sobs loud and clear. Your sniffles and whimpers flooded the room, as you clung onto each other one last time, wiping away each others tears, sometimes kissing them away from each other’s faces. You felt like you lost little bit of yourself that night. A piece of yourself that Keanu would always be the rightful owner to.

As the night started to slowly fade, and the horizon began to paint itself with a warm, embers glow, you heard the world outside slowly begin to awake. But there was no awakening from the lament you both had just endured.

With a whimper out of your throat, and a whisper so low you could barely breath it out, you spoke a final phrase.

“ _Thank you, for everything_.”


End file.
